Today I'm talking about mean girls. The kind who made your life a living hell when you were a teen. Remember them? They enjoyed talking about you behind your back, making up rumors and watching you squirm as you attempted to put your reputation back together. We've all had to deal with at least one 'mean girl' in our life. Whether in high school, college, or even at your current job.
Well I had one. Her name was Amy. Amy was a year younger than me, but she was big for her age, and cunning. We were in like fourth and fifth grade at the time. She always found interesting ways to torture me. Sometimes it was running me down on the sidewalk as she rode her bike. Other times it was spraying me with the hose as I walked past her house to get home from school. Amy taunted me all the time. Until one day she pushed too far. Literally. I was walking with a friend and Amy came up behind me and pushed me in the back. I stumbled and fell. I didn't confront her, just acted like it didn't bother me and went home. However, my brothers saw what Amy had done. They, being the rowdy bunch they were, told me to get back out there and teach Amy a lesson. I was scared. One, I wasn't the confrontational type. Two, Amy was a mean little bitch. I didn't think I could beat her. My brothers felt differently. They knew I could take her. Still, I pleaded my case. What would mom do if she finds out I've been fighting. One of my brother's piped up and said, I'll handle that, you just go out there and show Amy what happens when she pushes a person too far. I took a deep breath and went outside. Amy stood in the neighbor's yard, taunting me more. Yelling at me, calling me a chicken. The neighbor lady was frowning at me. Basically calling me a bully, because poor little Amy is just misuderstood. Yeah, don't get me started on that one. All the adults thought Amy was a sweet little girl who wouldn't hurt a fly. *snort*
I didn't go to Amy, that would have put me in the old hag's yard, instead I stood in my driveway and waited. My brothers were on the front porch, watching. I shook I was so scared. Finally, as predicted, Amy came to me. No way could she pass up a chance to torture me some more. First let me explain something, before I tell you what happened. I'm the youngest with three older brothers. I learned early on how to defend myself, even if I didn't quite realize it at the time, I did actually know how to fight. So, Amy, being the idiot she was, came at me. First she tried a punch, which I evaded. Come on, seriously? Do you even know how many punches I've evaded over the years?! Hello! Brothers here! Then she tried a kick. I grabbed her leg and shoved it upwards. Amy fell on her ass. It was a concrete driveway, I knew that hurt. She jumped up and gave me this look then ran over to old lady Hall's house. I waited. Amy never came back out. Amy learned a lesson that day. If you push someone far enough, they WILL fight back, even if it's not in their nature to do so.
So, as you can imagine my brothers cheered, 'way to go, sis!' They were so proud. LOL Mom never found out, surprisingly. Though I knew Billy would keep his word. No matter what, I knew he would have gone to bat for me.
Why do I bring up this little episode. Things have come back around. Now my daughter is being picked on. Not physically, but verbally. A friend at school takes great pleasure in calling her names. Prostitute, slut, pocket whore (because Kati is short). The list goes on. Kati is like me, she rolls her eyes and moves on, she's not confrontational. She's not a slut and she doesn't see the point in defending herself. Everyone else at school knows Kati isn't those things. She has a lot of friends, the girl who talks shit, talks shit about everyone. She enjoys the backstabbing, spreading nasty rumors, calling people names. She just simply finds joy in it. The thing is, I know this girl. I know she doesn't come from a bad home. There's no abuse or secret reason why she's this way. Truly, some girls just enjoy being mean. There, I said it. I refuse to make excuses for her. She was not raised to do these things. Her siblings are not this way, at all. So what's the answer? As a mother I want to call this girl's parents and tell them what their daughter is doing. I've told Kati that. She cringes when I say that because clearly I may as well slice her throat. Having mommy come to her rescue is about as embarrassing as it gets. If the taunting is bad now, you can imagine how much worse it would get, right? So, I told Kati the other day that I know she doesn't like to confront this girl. It's not in her to do that. But at some point she's going to have to face her fears and stand her ground. I don't think that day is too far off. And I think that when it happens, she'll be stricking a blow for just about every girl up at the school, because they've all come under this bitch's verbal attacks at some point. Is telling Kati to get in this girl's face the right thing to do? Yes. Why? Because sometimes it's important to stand up for yourself. It's just that simple.
So, have you been bullied? What was the solution, if any?