I'll be the first to admit I haven't been tops at my game over the past few days. I've been a little bit blue! I hate when that happens because usually, I'm Ms. Cheerful. A friend sent this to me yesterday though and it perked me right up. So in honor of the weekend and because we all need a laugh, I'm posting this. Enjoy!
THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES
Six married men
will be dropped on an island with one car and
3 kids each for six weeks.
Each kid
will play
two sports
and either take music
or dance
classes.
There is
no fast food.
Each man
must
take care of his 3 kids
keep his assigned house
clean,
correct all homework,
and
complete science
projects,
cook, do laundry,
and pay a list of
'pretend' bills
with not enough money.
In
addition, each man
will have to budget in
money
for groceries each week.
Each man
must remember the
birthdays
of all
their friends and
relatives,
and send
cards out
on time--no emailing.
Each man
must also
take each child to a doctor's appointment,
a dentist appointment
and a haircut
appointment.
He must
make
one unscheduled and
inconvenient
visit per
child
to the Urgent
Care.
He must
also
make cookies or
cupcakes
for a social function.
Each man
will be responsible for
decorating his own assigned house,
planting flowers outside
and keeping it presentable
at
all times.
The men
will only
have access to television
when the kids are asleep
and all chores are done.
The men
must
shave their
legs,
wear makeup
daily,
adorn
himself with jewelry,
wear uncomfortable yet stylish
shoes,
keep fingernails polished
and
eyebrows groomed.
During
one
of the six weeks,
the men will have to endure
severe abdominal cramps, back aches,
and have
extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or
slow down
from other duties.
They
must attend
weekly school meetings,
church, and find
time
at least once to spend the afternoon
at the park or a similar
setting.
They
will need to
read a book to the kids
each
night and in the
morning,
feed
them, dress
them,
brush
their teeth and
comb
their hair by 7:00 am.
A test
will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be
required to know all of the following information:
each child's
birthday,
height, weight,
shoe size, clothes size and doctor's
name .
Also the child's weight at birth,
length, time of birth,
and length of labor,
each child's favorite color,
middle name,
favorite snack,
favorite song,
favorite drink,
favorite
toy,
biggest fear and
what they want to be when they grow
up.
The kids
vote them off the island
based on performance.
The last man wins
only if...
he still
has enough energy
to be intimate with his spouse
at a moment's notice.
If the
last man does win,
he can play the game over and over
and over
again for the next 18-25 years
eventually earning the right
To be
called Mother!
After
you get done laughing,
send this to as many females as
you
think
will get a kick out of it and
as many men as you think
can
handle
it.
Just don't send it back to me....
I'm going to bed.
12 comments:
Hilarious! If only it would actually air now.
I liked it too, Emma. I needed a laugh yesterday and that one did the trick! I'm with you. I would soooo watch that.
That's great. I would totally watch that show.
I wish this show was real.
I guess Sweetie and I are very lucky. We only had one child, (not by choice) and we generally didn't give a damn about lawns, flowers, gardens and such. Sports, he never really showed and interest in any. Medical trips, only when he did the usual things kids do.
As to Sweetie's manner of dress. Jeans, t-shirts and sneakers are her preferred attire and when she does get dressed up she takes her time and I do my best to not rush her or hover.
I would never try to tell her how to do her job and the one time she thought I did nothing, she read the next week about the 23 hour rescue I was on and only wanted to hold me after that.
I would not survive your program Regina, and I freely admit it too.
HAHAHAHA, Dr. Karl!!! You are one in a million, my dear! My husband helped A LOT with this kind of stuff when the kids were little but I can certainly say he got a little overwhelmed with the fraction of this stuff he did.
We had TWO kids with twice a week soccer practices for each, at the same times but in DIFFERENT PLACES and woven into the mix were dance lessons for the daughter and alternate sports for the boy. Talk about CRAZY!!! Now that they are grown, I can laugh about it all but I sure wasn't laughing THEN.
I'm pitching this to my company straight away.
LOL!
That was AWESOME!!!
:D
G.
Very funny, but depressingly true.
Thanks for the laugh Regina, I needed it. Oh, can I be the host of the show or at least one of the judges. We can't let them judge themselves they have no clue!
I think we need a JUDGING PANEL. Then we can all come and laugh our butts off! Someone can bring drinks and music. HA.
Love this one--though I'm slightly embarrassed to say that if my husband put his mind to it, he could probably outplay me on this game! ;) Lucky for me, that's not how we've divvied things up :D Would hate to be out of job!
This cracks me up. My huband would seriously throw himself off a cliff. He flips out on the simple stuff and tells me that's why I'm a mommy. They could put this on Pay Per View and I'd pay to watch it!
I'm with Kelley, I'd totally watch that one! LOL
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