Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Problems at school...
As parents we always want what's best for our kids. We want to shield them as much as possible from the hardships in life. Want them happy, healthy, smart, with tons of friends and everything. My little girl is six and she's in kindergarten. We moved a couple weeks ago and she started at a new school. She was nervous as was I but she made friends really easily at her old school so I was confident she would here too. I didn't cry until I got back to the car when I dropped her off the first day and was ecstatic when I picked her up and found out she made a new friend. A little girl we'll call M.
For the past two weeks she and M have been buddies. They hang out at school and my kiddo is always talking about her. She started mentioning this M eating stuff from my daughters lunch. Told her its nice to share, but she needed to eat her food and M her own. There were a couple other little issues, nothing major, but little getting into trouble things that had never happened with my girl before. I started wondering about this M, but what could I do?
Well, on Monday my daughter came home upset because M didn't want to be her friend anymore. I know kids are fickle, especially at this age. Stuff like this happens all the time. I told my kiddo that. She probably said something she didn't mean and things would be better tomorrow. Well Tuesday came and my kiddo had a bad day at school. She came home really upset, grumpy and told me M still didn't want to be her friend and that when she tried to sit by her, M told her no she wanted someone else too.
This broke my heart. I HATE stuff like this. It's so hard for a six year old to understand. I told my daughter to find another friend. That a real friend wouldn't be mean to you like that and tell you they didn't want to be your friend anymore. I don't want her waiting around one someone like that, but its still hard. She's new and these other kids have been going to school together for months. I just want her to be happy and not to have any problems with kids at school. Kids can be HARSH. I know this is a minor problem so far, and it could easily blow over but I've noticed that we're getting those "mean girls" younger and younger. I see it when we go to the park. A group of kids against others, deciding who is cool enough to play on what. It's crazy to me. Things just weren't like that when I was in Elementary school. High school yes, but elementary school? It's nuts.
So keep her in your thoughts that she has a good day today! Lets hope she meets a different friend. Raising kids is hard!
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7 comments:
I swear. I think the 'mean girl' thing is an epidemic. This will pass but it's not fun to go through it. My daughter was in the first grade, when one of the girls told the others that if they were nice to my daughter, she wouldn't be their friend. Oh boy. It was a rough week. She was confused and of course, I saw the whole thing for what it was....mean stuff and bullying. In the end, I called up one of the other moms who was a friend of mine and told her what was going on. Instantly, her daughter and mine were thrown together for play dates and such and the thing blew over. I hate to say it, but this shit gets worse as they get older.
Ohhhh... I am so sorry to hear this. It rips my heart out to hear stories like this. My baby (yea, they will always be our babies) is 16... And we have moved three times in her school life. And it was hard at the second school because the kids there had like four years to bond before she got there. It was rough.
To me, it makes me look at the parents to see just how they raise their children. I often (when she does not know I am watching) can see the outcome of how I raised my daughter through her actions with her friends or her words and it touches my heart to know that she listens to me and something sunk in. But at that age... where do you think these kids are getting the idea to be mean.... I will stop... I will keep you baby in my prayers that she finds a true friend!
Oh, man. This sucks. I'll say a prayer for her. Alisha and Kati both have had terrible things happen. They've toughened up to a degree, but it's still so heartbreaking when someone is mean to them and the tears come.
I agree kids are getting meaner younger. It's awful! I wish i could honestly say that will never happen to my little boys, but i know it most likely will. :(
Have a nice chat with the teacher. Privately... before school. Tell her/him your worries, what is going on, and hopefully she/he can be aware of it and steer better friends your child's way. I've put 4 kids in kindergarten so... I've been here. Usually if there's been a problem... the teachers were really helpful. They can put the nicer kids close to your child, sit them next to each other, and new friends will be made.
Thanks for the advice and sympathy everyone. She's working on finding different friends!
I am still finding it hard to get real friends and I am an adult. The Mean Girl phase is now a way of life for some people. I really do try and stay away from women period. They don't make good friends for me. I hate the pettiness that always goes with it.
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