Spring is in full force here. Trees are budding, the sun is shining and the wind is roaring like a lion. I love this time of year especially after the long, cold winter. But my all time favorite thing about spring is the appearance of Cadbury Creme Eggs in the grocery stores. I'm an egg-a-holic with no 12-step program in sight. So the other day, I greedily picked up three of them thinking I'd save them, savor them and indulge when I needed a nice little choco/creme-filled pick me up. Didn't really worry too much about squirreling them away because Mr. Regina often makes it clear that he's not much of a 'candy eater'. Um. Yeah right.
So the weekend was tough. I didn't get to write as planned because I had a small computer issue and was advised by my computer guys to not turn it on and bring it in on Monday. Yesterday I loaded it up and drove over to the computer store. I'm only about 5'1"...muchkin sized and I could NOT see over the top of the computer I was carrying so as I entered the store with my arms loaded down I tripped on a dumb mat they'd put in the middle of the floor. Damn thing was about 2 inches thick, I didn't see it, and my toe caught the edge. I flailed around and managed to keep my ass from hitting the floor and saving my computer in the process but I seriously messed up my ankle. Dang thing hurts like crazy now. It's a swollen, achy mess. Anyway, I get the computer in despite the mishap, pick it up later and as the evening wore on, I kept thinking about my Cadbury Eggs. I wanted one. I needed one. I deserved one. Hell, I'd had a bad day. So I go into the cabinet where I keep our chocolate goodies and they're GONE. Gone with the WIND. I think I actually gasped out loud. I'm telling you, I was just mortified and I knew damn good and well what had happened. Sucking in a deep breath, trying to remain calm, I limped into Mr. Regina's office.
I said (in my calmest, most reasonable voice). "Hey, I had some Cadbury Creme Eggs in the kitchen. Do you know what happened to them?"
His eyes went wide and then he narrowed them and puffed out his chest in a manly way that made me want to smack him. "I ate em."
"Yeah. I tried one and I liked it so I ate the rest."
"Did you think for one minute that I might've wanted one?"
He grins at me in a nasty way and looks pointedly toward my ass. "I was helping you. I was thinking of your butt."
So I left. I went to my own office but I was so mad I couldn't THINK. He ate my candy and was completely unapologetic. After a bit I couldn't stand it anymore. I limped back into his office and stared him down. It was an emotional High Noon. I swear.
"You ate my SPRING!" I hollered.
"Those damn eggs are my favorite thing about spring! And YOU ate THEM."
He laughed and shook his head like I was a silly child obviously not comprehending the complexities of getting between a woman and her chocolate. "What? That's your favorite thing? Are you trying to tell me you don't like flowers?"
You can only imagine what I said to THAT!
Moral of this story: Hide the damn Cadbury Eggs.