Thursday, June 9, 2011

BDSM and The Sound of Music (a satire)

I saw a headline earlier this week with a picture of that dude from Sound of Music. The General, the Colonel, or something. To be honest, I'm not a huge musical lover (don't get me started on Glee, because that's the wrench thrower), so this movie gave me hot and cold flashes whenever it would come on, as a kid. You know that pit of the stomach nausea you get when you have to take a math test and you'd really rather be somewhere else RIGHT NOW? Yeah, that's how musicals make me feel. Like if I could reasonably crawl out of my own skin and disappear, leaving my Mia shell behind, that would be acceptable.

I said KNEEL, bitch.
Whoops. Got a little off topic there. Anyway, the dude. This dude to be precise. The headline was something like, "What's Wrong With People," with the sub-header, "After 44 years the Sound of Music is all anyone wants to talk about." Now I'm guessing he means fans still ask him about that work more than things he's done since then.

I think the standard answer is to clutch your hands under your chin, blink you baby whatevers and say, "It's because we love it so. It's part of our childhood. It's magical. It's my first memory of moving film EVAR." or something to that effect.

But, as you would guess, I suppose differently.I'm going to say it was foreshadowing. Foreshadowing of what, Mia? So glad you asked. BDSM. Yep that's right. Dr. Colonel General Badass Daddy Guy walked around with a riding crop and a face void of expression. This tells me that either he rides a horse a lot (and while I believe there was one, I don't remember seeing scads of them, especially not inside the house where he continued to bandy that crop about), he's a pompous ass (which could still be true), or he really got off on spanking people. Namely, Julie Andrews. Puts a whole new spin on her defiance gone subservient nature, doesn't it?

You will come for me while I watch. Make it good.
He also kept a strict household where all the members desperately tried to please him. They "sirred" him, feared his displeasure, worried when they disobeyed, and all he had to do was take care of their basic needs. On the one occasion where they sing and he stands outside with tears in his eyes, he never let them see him as anything but super strong.

But Mia, you ask, what does this have to do with foreshadowing? Another fantastic question, darlings! Ah Ha! What is one of the romance industry's biggest selling subgenres? BDSM. What is showing up more and more on TV? BDSM documentaries, jokes in sitcoms, and BDSM in crime dramas laden with sexual undertones. What do we find in more and more movies? The suggestion of BDSM. I won't go into the Thor's hammer thing, but the dude carries an implement of pain and power and is a god. I'm just sayin' folks. I mean, I could be having this same blog post discussion about My Fair Lady and Rex Harrison. FORESHADOWING!
Man who spanks

So, Mr. Sound of Music man. The reason people still ask you about that role is because you titillated them with the suggestion of dominance and sex. You ruled with an iron fist, protected them at all costs, sang sometimes, and yes, you spanked Julie Andrews. Something people everywhere have wanted to do since the beginning of time--which is how long she's been around. You are a BDSM precursor before it was acceptable to talk about BDSM. You thought we were fooled, but we weren't! We were with you every step of the way, you dirty dirty boy.

And that's my spin on it.
~Mia

7 comments:

Marie Rose Dufour said...

Now that's a spin that I won't be able to get out of my head then next time I see that movie. ;)

Harlie Reader said...

Wow! Can't get the image out of my mind now. Thanks. Never thought of TSOM ever like that and now...

Harlie Reader said...

Come to think about it, he was the villian in the movie Up and he just has that voice. Something to think about...

D. F. Krieger said...

Oh my freaking goddess, ROFL. I just can't even form a real sentence I'm laughing so hard!

Mia Watts said...

@Marie Rose. :D You're WELCOME! I love to share my twisty.

Mia Watts said...

@Harlie, Right? The behind the scenes films were all about him spanking Julie Andrews. Just like in Allie's post a few weeks ago about the BDSM club. I'm tellin' ya. They were NAUGHTY on that set. Dirty dirty dirty. LOL.

Mia Watts said...

@D.F. My work here is done.