Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Oh Hell No! Reading turn-offs
Seductive Sally races through the Brazilian Rain Forest, bullets flying as Ripped Rob follows protectively behind. The bad guys are close, too close for comfort. Breath heaving and bellowing from her lungs, she plows through the jungle, trying hard to ignore the scratches that appear on her long, shapely legs as the rush ensues. She hasn't bathed in days. Her hair is a nasty, tangled mess and she knows no amount of laundry soap will restore her skimpy running-from-bad- guys attire to its former glory. Panties? Yes, the lacy undergarments she'd donned three days ago were history and her ladies 24-hour deodorant protection long gone.
Finally! Yes, finally the shooting stops. Ms. Seductive and Ripped Rob have lost them. Bosom heaving she drops down at the base of a massive tree. Valiantly, she ignores the bugs squirming beneath her as she gives Ripped Rob a seductive look. Sweat has effectively glued her thin tee shirt to her body and her heart races. But this time it's not from the wild dash through the Brazilian foliage. No sirree. Ripped Rob's eyes narrow to focus heatedly on her perky nipples as they press against her sweat-soaked shirt.
"You're hot, babe," Rob says, his voice rough with desire.Sweat streaks through the grime on his face totally turn her on. Well, yes she was hot. She has been racing through the jungle for the better part of several days but he wants her. He really wants her. "I think I'll strip those rank clothes from your body and kiss every inch of your sweaty skin. How does that sound?"
"Yummy," she breathes. "Come and give it to me, Big Boy."
Another little tale:
Victim Victoria is chained. She is a slave. Oh hells nooooo. Striped naked before a throng of hungry looking men, she squirms against her bonds knowing one of them, or many, all want to do the nasty with her. Whatever will she doooooo???? Wait! The crowds part as one of the lusty dudes pushes his way through the throng to claim her. Violence swims in his strangly sexy eyes.
"You are mine," he growls
Terror fills her mind. What will he dooooo???? What will he dooooo????
Scary-man carries her off to the nearest dirt floor, throws her down and looks mighty damn sexy while doing so. But still she is scared. Or is she? Victim Vickie's eyes widen in horror. Yes, horror. He will force her to have sex. He will force his massive, yes massive, THING in her. OWWWW. The pain. The degradation.
So yes, Scary-man wastes no time in 'doing it' to her as screams of 'don't hurt me' fill the room but suddenly Victim Vickie isn't scared any more.
"I think I love you," she whispers five minutes later. "By the way, what is your name?"
The scenarios above are my feeble attempt to illustrate two of my biggest pet peeves in erotic or romance fiction. Rape fantasy stories are a huge turn off for me and I won't read them. Violence against women is not my idea of entertainment and a heroine who is too stupid to live? Forget about it. My other pet peeve? Well, having sex while utterly filthy is just...well...nasty. What about you? What are some of your biggest reading turn offs?