I've been thinking a lot about this lately. You already know what I think about perky boobed, naturally blond, size two heroines. So I'm looking at the flip side of the coin now. Even ask the great Desiree Holt her opinion and she actually agreed with me. Here's the deal. Heroes. Or more specifically heroes from my romance books or others. What would I do if I gorgeous, built like a tank man came into my life. In my head I'd jump him while stripping and thanking God for my glorious luck! In reality I'd probably wet myself while running the 100 yard dash. Because really who can deal or live with that kind of perfection? Which is why my men *in books* are somehow in someway always flawed. Bad temper, snarky sense of humor *though I don't consider that one a flaw*, scars, I even have one with a compulsion problem or some other physical imperfection making them more than good looking manikins.
Men who are men really do it for me. I don't want a guy who spends more time on his hair than I do, which considering how little I do, doesn't amount to much. I once dated a guy who had more stuff in the bathroom than I did. More bottles, more lotions and other crap. Really? I mean I'm a girly girl all the way and the only reason I don't spend more time on my hair is because I have naturally curly locks that do whatever they want anyway. However I also don't relish the idea of a man with a beer belly, dirt beneath his nails and body odor.
What does all this mean? It means I and most women I know, want the perfect combination of the two. A man's man who can change a tire, but also know his way around the finer things in life. I don't think the two or mutually exclusive either. I've seen them. I know they exist...somewhere. Maybe they're kept on some type of nature perserve so they won't get hurt in the wild. Hurt by desperate women foaming at their shining lipstickes mouths at the perfection they're missing.
If they're out there would you mind letting me visit? Just to see them. I promise not to feed them or try to grab their remotes. I'd even promise not to touch, but we all know I'd be lying :)
So let's answer the question every man ask! Let's tell the world what we really want!! We want men to be men until we don't. Then we want them to be able to read our minds, listen to our problems without trying to solve them and for once put the lid down on the toilet seat. Is that really too much to ask?
Now let me have it! Hit me with your best shot and fire away!! Yeah, I've got song title running through my head so don't ask.
The person with the best answer gets a free copy from my backlist. Now get to it!
16 comments:
I want a man who will make me scream without thinking of himself first, or second, or third! ;) A man who puts gas in my car before I even know it needs it. One who listens to my day while messaging my feet as I drink the glass of wine he poured for me. Someone who says, "I know your tired, let's go and grab some dinner." I guess ultimately, I want to be in an erotic romance where I can lick ice cream off a man who covers his six-pack abs with a three-piece suit. "Darling, I make enough money for you to stay home and write all day. I believe in your talent and nothing would make me happier." (I read this and actually laugh. )
My ideal man works hard for his money; can do more around the house than take out the trash or change a light bulb; capable of cooking a meal and cleaning up after himself; knows his way around a car engine or at least has the money to hire a good mechanic; accepts me as I am; appreciates the good things in life w/o being snobbish about it; isn't afraid to laugh at himself or admit when he's wrong; and has an open mind toward controversial subjects. And is a good communicator all around. He's also my best cheerleader when it comes to my writing career. Seriously, is this too much to ask?
Glad to hear someone else likes imperfection. I really really want to read about a man who has flaws, but at the end of the day can love and let himself be loved by a good woman (not a size 2). I know the ones I write about are that way. Mind you, they are pretty darn good lookin'.
I am married to a guy who is driven, works hard for his money and is pretty giving after 24 years of training, can fix pretty much anything wrong in the house OR the car (and loves doing it), is fastidious about his yard (i.e. I don't ever have to weed or mow or any of that crap) and is coming around to supporting the "writing thing."
That said, I want Marie's guy's twin brother. thanks
Liz
See, you ladies know exactly what I'm talking about!! Perfect is BORING!! Perfect is well too perfect. It's the mistakes that make life interesting.
Marie, Molly, & Liz, I loved your answers! Thanks for taking the time to prove me RIGHT! I love ti when it happens.
Now I have to shut down to catch a plane :( But I'll still be checking the answers from my phone at the airport. So keep them coming!
The ideal man would be one who considers my wants and needs above his own; willing to sacrifice anything to ensure my happiness. Of course, being handsome would be a plus++++ Oh yeah, romantic with a sense of adventure in the bedroom - or where ever else we might come up with!
The man of my dreams doesn't have to be rich or drop dead gorgeous, although those are definate options. I just want a man who gets who I am. He doesn't want to change me, but is willing to help me change myself. He does not need me to take care of him, but appreciates when I do. He recognizes that some days I've worked as hard or harder than he did & pampers me without complaining or making me feel like he's going above & beyond his duty. He trusts me & is trustworthy in return. He is strong enough to admit if he is wrong & not an ass when I am the one who is wrong. My happiness will be as important to him, as his happiness is to me, which means we will both get what we want & need out of the relationship.
Sounds pretty good huh? Wonder if he actually exists.
drainbamaged.gyzmo at gmail.com
I would love a man who is tall, handsome with dark features, green eyes and being wealthy would be a plus. However, I do like tall men with a little pudge to the belly. I want a man who loves to listen and talk when I am in the mood to talk. He needs to be protective, caring, considerate, useful, fun and open to new things and ideas (b/c I am forever changing) I want him to take the lead in household chores and enjoy watching classic B&W films and period pieces with me. He needs to be just quirky enough to love my silly, my rockin, and my country sides. To sum it up, he needs to love all that I am now and all I will become. (Gee, I really am looking for a miracle man)
My favorite kind of hero is a cowboy. He's sexy and smokin' in his Wranglers, boots, and Stetson, and he's a little bit of a bad boy. He likes to live dangerously on those bulls, but he has a soft and tender side, and always treats his woman like a lady. I especially like it when he says, "Yes, Ma'am." in his slow, Southern drawl.
debrastjohn08@yahoo.com
DebraStJohn
Great post. Enjoyed reading.
In RL, the hubby will do just fine.
In fiction? Tall, not too muscular and long hair.
I love this blog post! Like you, I don't want a man who dresses better than me or spends more time at the gym than with me.
And please men, unless you have a unibrow, don't wax your eyebrows--and especially don't wax them so they look like sperm over your eyes. It creeps me out.
Now, for that perfect man, he has to have a sense of humor. I don't care if he's snarky and sarcastic but he has to be able to laugh at himself too. And he has to know when to joke and when to zip it. He also has to be able to take whatever he dishes out.
He doesn't have to be a body builder or an athlete, but someone who takes care with his appearance. A man can be big without being a fat slob or thin without being a skank. Clean teeth. I don't care if they're a bit crooked. Just brush them and use mouth wash.
I don't care if he has a college degree or if he works for UPS as long as he's hardworking and intelligent.
I want a man who'll listen without trying to solve my problem. If I call to tell him my car won't start, I don't want him to say, "Well, I can't fix it over the phone." Unless I ask something of him, I just called to inform him or bitch about the situation. He needs to listen and sympathize. (My husband has trouble with this one. After 31 years, I have abandoned all hope here.)
He should help around the house but I understand if he doesn't put the throw pillows back on the bed or notice if the curtains are dusty. He's supposed to be a real man after all. lol! But I sure do like a man who helps with the dishes and laundry! My hubs gets brownie points for this!
He should know how to have fun and know how to be serious.
And he should always, always, take out the trash!
But most of all, he should be someone who enjoys the same things I do but understands that I don't have to like watching Nascar on TV and he doesn't have to like reading for us to be happy.
Thank God, my husband is just such a man. I wouldn't trade him for all the hunks in the world!
All my men are good looking with abs to die for, but flawed in some way.
My woman may not always be the perfect ten, and I like the girl next door names for them.
Janice~
Last week, a young fellow told me that we women only want male beauties, all ripped and perfect.
I posted on my FB what I truly wanted, as he was SO wrong.
But, the timing of your blog is perfect, as that's been on my mind, so I'm going to post what I'd written on my FB wall:
***********************************
Okay, okay. On another wall, there's a conversation about us gals and how we are obsessed with male beauty.
Well, hunnies. Let me set MY record straight.
I like looking at pretty fellas just as much as the next gal. Why not?
But in real life? If a strapping hunk like the star from old, Victor McGlaglen, walked into my real life? A big lug, NOT pretty, but sporting a billion-watt smile and a 24-carat heart?
Why, sugar, I'd drop everything and drag that lug into my bed before he could say Hell's Bells.
Why, just look (picture of Victor McGlaglen inserted on post)...here he is with Louise Brooks, my female star idol. Oddly, though...in films, he rarely got the girl. Go figure. Sigh.
I want a man who loves me for me, flaws and all. I want a man I find attractive, which isn't the same as every other woman's taste. I want someone who will talk to me and heck even argue with me. I want someone who wants to spend time with me but also has a life of his own. I want someone who can cook, because I can't and take out is too expensive. I want a man who wants to travel and take me to all my desired hot spots. And speaking of hot spots I want a man who will hit all of mine and yet still be able to laugh in the bedroom. My ideal man will probably not be perfect as I like my men a little sarcastic and artistic but he will be perfect for me.
Oh wow, you ladies you rock with your answers. We all have pretty similar desires on the inside, but a little different on the outside :) I LOVE it!!
So now that I'm pooped from the flight & drive I'll pick a winner. I use the scientific method of eenie, meeine, miney, moe.
& the winner is LIZ!! Congrats, lady awesome. Pick a book from my backlist & send your selection to Allie@AllieStandifer.com
I want a man/hero to be charming, protective, considerate...with any flaw that can be overlooked because of his good qualities. "Perfect" men don't exist; they'd be boring!
No Adonis, but a great smile and "hungry" eyes!
I want a man first who has a personality stronger than mine, and knows when to take control and when NOT too. I want someone over six feet tall and dark hair and tattoos and piercings. And most deff smells good.
And when I'm talking to my friends on FB or RHB not his feelings hurt because I'm not right beside him. I want him to be able to hang with my teenage boys and joke with them, mainly my son with down syndrome and not feel that he has to because he's he with me but because he wants to. And then he put's up with my daughter because of me...LOL
I want him when I'm reading one of my fav BGirls books from Allie let me read and him find something else to til I'm ready and just maybe when i'm not he's leaning overmy shoulder asking me in my ear..."you ready for bed"..with handcuffs in one hand and a flogger in the other..
Cass AKA (Lady of Licks)
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