Who Is Raising These Kids?

A pet peeve of mine happens to be rude kids. Children who simply have NO sense of acting properly within society. Over and over again I have kept running into this as I was raising (still am with the 16 yr old) my children.

Now I'm not saying my kids were/are perfect. They're not. No one is. Not even me--though I come close...lol The other day I went through the drive-thru at Wendy's for a grilled chicken sandwich for The Boy. I had zoned out and the girl at the window was trying to give me the bag of goodies which I didn't see.
Once I realized this, I simply grabbed the bag and handed it to The Boy. He gave me this stern WTF look and told me I should have apologized for leaving the girl hanging like that.

I'm rolling my eyes here. Yeah, at some point my just-don't-give-a-damn works more than fine. I tried to explain to the boy that I was tired and cranky and it was just a small oversight on my part, but he was having none of it. We ended up getting into a heated argument with me on the stupid side, of course.

You can't teach a kid to have respect for all, to use social skills in every setting, and then fail miserably at it. He'll call your ass on it every time. He informed me at record pace that a minimum wage burger flipper's feelings were just as important as a high-priced attorney or a cop trying to give me a ticket.

Well...he was right and I was wrong.

In the meantime, he has friends galore who are in and out of my house who are rude and quite frankly socially inept. I have a new neighbor who is socially inept. I'm surrounded by people/kids who simply don't know how to socialize. One of the boy's friends has something to say for every single thing I say. He thinks he is correcting me. He's not, but it's weird. He comes across as this know-it-all who knows nothing and constantly embarrasses himself. Another one uses my house like it's his own. Last weekend I found him in my bedroom lying across my bed talking on his cell phone. He said he had needed more privacy. I keep my handbag complete with wallet in that room. I wasn't happy. He's also the same kid who used The Boy's toothbrush and brush. Uh huh... Caught him in the act.

Another kid saw that I had a load of clothes washing and stripped out of his and tossed them in--then exited the bathroom wearing nothing but a towel and a smile. I can't tell you the number of times I've sent a text message to The Boy asking him to come downstairs because "we need to talk".

Bottom line? I keep asking him where he's finding these kids. He keeps telling me that all kids are like that. I keep saying "so you use other people's toothbrushes and wash your clothes at will and go and get into their mother's bed when you're at their house?"

To which he replied: "I'm not normal. I'm the exception. I'm too well-mannered and don't exactly fit in. But this is high school and I'm just hanging out. Just chill and keep telling me when they do something stupid. I'll keep them in line."

Okay.

Next?

This weekend I realized that I had become a taxi for about a half a dozen kids. My entire weekend was shot all to hell because of me giving rides to and from home--to and from the park, the mall, and movies, to all of The Boy's friends. That stopped Sunday afternoon at 4 p.m. when I declared myself exhausted. So I informed The Boy and he said he understood. Said he realized that I was doing everything and other parents were simply ignoring their kids and didn't give a damn where they were or who they were with or how they got there.

And that said it all.

Why are these parents not more involved in the lives of their children? Hell yeah they may be 16 but that doesn't equate to FINISHED!!!! There are two of The Boy's friends who have asked to come and live with us. No, they weren't joking. It was pitiful. They flat out told me that their parents had no time for them. For the first time in my life, I honestly didn't know what to say. I remained quiet for the longest time.

I hope I said all of the right things to these boys. Informed them that time gets away from you. That their parents loved them but work and general responsibilities involved with day-to-day life can really take up a lot of room in a person's life. I suggested they try talking with their parents. Try watching a movie with them and engaging them in conversation. I said a lot. But I was ill-equipped to deal with it really. Shocked.

My kid says he's lucky--even though I can be a pain-in-the-ass. lol He says sometimes I am just too involved in his life. I just looked at him and told him to get used to it. 'Cause it sure as hell ain't gonna stop any time too soon--hmmmm...maybe when he's 80. LOL

Everybody's A Redneck After A Six-Pack

I have in-law issues. Never suspected I would, but I do. I’m a nice person. Not too judgmental. Well…unless someone is showing their stupid side. I hate stupid.

So my middle child is WITH child and about to marry what I thought was a very nice man. And he is in some ways. He’s a good provider, and for the most part, good to her. However, he’s very controlling and is a major know-it-all.

Their courtship was “whirlwind”. Two months into the relationship and she was pregnant. Okay, I didn’t say a word. Not a word. From the time they met up until about three months ago, he would get mad with her while shopping and storm out of the store and leave her. Yes, leave her stranded. She’d call me and I’d drive to wherever she was and bring her home with me. We’d wait until he got over his pissiness and he’d come and get her. This happened a total of five times, and I never said a word.

Until number six.

That last time was IT as far as I was concerned. He pulled up on the side of the road in front of my house and waited for her to come out. But that time, I went out with her. You see, I never wanted to stick my nose in their business, but I finally decided that if I was going to be forced to deal with his shit, then I had a right. So I walked around to the driver’s side and laid it on the line for him.

“You will not leave my pregnant daughter stranded again. Do I make myself clear?”

He said, “Yes, ma’am. I’m sorry.”

And that was that. Things have gone smoothly between them since. But then he needed an outlet for his anger I guess. Because after that they’d come to visit and he seemed to have developed the most condescending attitude. And worse.

Not only does my soon-to-be son-in-law think that Southerners are all rednecks and don’t have sense enough to get in out of the rain, but he’s a damn bigot, too! What has my child gotten herself into?

On two separate occasions before this last one on Saturday, I had to break up arguments between him, my boy, and my oldest daughter. According to him, both of them are on their way to Bubba University because A) they are from the South and are too stupid to live, and B) they support a political platform he doesn’t (namely any program designed to help the poor).

In other words, my kids and I are REDNECKS.

He’s from New York, a perfectly lovely state I’m sure. I’ve only been to NYC and only a couple of times for short visits at that. So I can’t really say I’d like or dislike living there. He’s been in the South for two years now and says he is making money hands over fists because Southerners are just plain dumb. But he hates the South and mocks everything about it.

I swear to you… I have held my tongue to the point of biting it. I’ve done this because for some odd damn reason my baby girl loves this freaking idiot. And she’s pregnant with his baby. Which means stuck.

So Saturday when I was informed they were coming for a visit (they live about thirty-five minutes away), my stomach knotted. I stayed mad all damn day. I kept remembering some of the things he’d said on previous visits and my blood simply boiled. At the same time, I tried not to be angry for the sake of my girl. What’s a MOM to do?

Five o’clock rolled around. They were due at six. I drove three blocks to the local convenient store and bought a six-pack of Bud Light Platinum. You know the ones—in the pretty blue bottles.  I came into the house, my treasure in hand, and got this from my brother:

“You think that’s a good idea?”

“I’m only going to have a couple. For my nerves. I’m tied up in knots.”

“You should just let me—“

“I know, I know. Bitch slap him a few times and bring him into line.”

I sat down with a beer as my oldest came downstairs.

Her eyes widened. “Do you think that’s a good idea?”

I rolled my eyes. “I’m only having a couple to take the edge off before they get here. I’m afraid if I don’t I might snap at him.”

She nodded slowly, and then looked at my bro. “This is gonna be good.”

He agreed. I left them in the living room and got on the computer for a while. Once I had finished the second beer, they arrived. But that was okay. Two beers on an empty stomach can really put you in a mellow mood. Sure can. So I was all smiles when they walked in. Hugs and kisses all around. I swear to you…I was good to go.

And then he started talking about the Hispanic guys that work for him.

I popped the top on another beer. And noooooooooo…did not offer him one. My oldest ran upstairs to get her brother. Later I was told that she informed him the show was starting and he was going to miss it.

By BEER FOUR, we were fully engaged. By BEER SIX I was threatening to punch him in the damn nose. They left with his threats of:

1) You are not allowed in the delivery room when the baby comes

2) You will never see my son

3) Don’t call my house or think you can come by when I’m at work

4) You’re no longer a part of our lives

Okay. I messed up. But after a six-pack, EVERYBODY IS A REDNECK!

Am I worried about his threats? Hell no. He’s a WUSS. Wild horses and ten SEAL TEAMS couldn’t keep me away from my baby girl and her baby. He just doesn’t realize that when he tapped into my REDNECK roots, that he tapped into the QUEEN!

I still think I should have punched him. My brother still says I should have let him do it.

The boy and my oldest daughter? They filmed it all with their phones. I have threatened to cut them out of my will if any of it ends up on You Tube.

‘Nuff said.

Bad Haircuts

Has anyone had a good haircut/style lately? I haven't had one in about ten years now. I don't know what the problem is but it can't be communication. I was very very specific about the length of my hair and that it should touch my shoulders. VERY SPECIFIC.

I left the shop thirty-five dollars poorer and hair up to my freaking ear lobes.

As I said, the last good haircut/style I had was about ten years ago. When I went back to the same stylist two months later she effed my hair up. Could not give me the same cut or style. I brought a picture with me, too.

Am I the only one who has this problem? For the last three or four years now, I have just let my hair grow quite a bit before giving in and getting it cut. I wait nine or ten months. I had to do it this time because I had started putting my hair up in a pony tail cause it was so damn long and always in the way. And that gave me a freaking headache. sighhhhhh

I hate my hair. And yes, it will grow. And yes, I'll try again in another nine or ten months. But if I tell another stylist that I want my hair touching my shoulders and she cuts it up to my damn ears?????

I AM NOT GOING TO PAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Moving in and Looking Around

 

 As most of you know, I've moved to Florida from my beloved Texas and I've been in the process of starting my life over again. This has been a sad but exciting journey and things are finally smoothing out a little bit. At the moment I'm living in a nice, roomy apartment with my daughter. It's a beautiful place with lots of trees, woodland creatures, birds and some very nice people but still....it's an apartment. For awhile I could only keep my mind on doing what must be done 'today'. I simply couldn't allow my mind to stretch out into the future to see what might be out there. There was furniture to buy, a kitchen to stock. I mean, I had to get EVERYTHING and that's a tough job. My mind simply reeled from all the things that had to be done in order to make my new little place a home.

A home? Well, I'm getting there but this apartment isn't my own.  We're comfy and settling in. We have beds and everything we really need still before now I haven't been able to think past immediate concerns. Today, finally, I think I'm in a place where I can look ahead a little bit. I've been trying to figure out lately where I want to live on a more permanent basis. A house, condo or townhouse? After living in an apartment for a few months and having a young child living in the apartment just above I already know that I don't want common walls. Uh uh. Not happening.

In the end, I think a cozy house will be the perfect thing. Today I'm heading out to take a 'walk-through' one of them. From internet pics the place looks lovely. Nice neighborhood, the right amount of living space, etc. So yes, I'm excited to get a peek. Since I tend to be cautious about these things, I'm fairly certain this will not be the only house I check out. Several neighborhoods have caught my eye so I'm sure the next few months will be busy.

Between househunting and writing (YES...WRITING) I'm getting there and already sowing the seeds for my new life. I'll keep you posted.

Clandestine Classics: IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME!

Okay, I’m going to confess something right off the bat here. I am not, nor have I ever been, a fan of the so-called classics. Jane Eyre, Pride and Prejudice, Sherlock Holmes, etc., were never high on my list of must read recommendations for anyone. I found the books to be incredibly boring.

Why?

Probably because I’m an action junkie and probably because I like reading sex scenes. Which, of course, is why I fell in love with Kathleen Woodiwiss romances from day one and why I like thrillers.

For those of you who love the classics—good for you. Nothing wrong with liking them. Just not my cup of tea. But now we have Clandestine Classics—classics such as Jane Eyre and Sherlock Holmes with sex scenes added—and I’m pretty excited about that.

Maybe now that the novels have been modernized, I can take another look and find what I need to give me a satisfying read and at the same time appreciate what others saw all along. Now I understand that when these tales were originally written there could be no sex. Society would have beheaded the authors if they had. LOL So who’s to say those authors, had they been living today, would not have included passionate, open-door sex?

Clandestine Classics is offered to readers by Total E-Bound Publishing. Click HERE for a list of titles. Those classics are in the public domain and anyone can use them. So what Total E-Bound did was to find some ab fab authors to take a few of these books and add some very sexy word count. You might also be interested in knowing that you’re not being charged for any word count other than what the Total E-Bound authors have added.

There’s been a whole lot of hoopla over these books. Some people are outraged that the classics have been touched. I read a blog post a couple of days ago in which the blogger claimed that this generation is warping society. LOL I know a couple of the authors who are involved in Clandestine Classics. Both are lovely ladies. Desiree Holt, who took on the task of sexing up Jane Austin’s Northanger Abbey, is a veteran writer of erotic romance with over a hundred books published—and she is a SILVER BEAUTY!!! 

Sarah Masters, the author who added heat to one of Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes tales, is an amazing individual. She writes under three or four different pen names and just blows me away with her writing talent. She’s also the best cover artist around. And she’s a MOM, wife, and a beautiful woman with incredible highlights in her hair that I’ve got to talk to her about (I want them. LOL)

Neither of these authors are warped nor are they warping society. LOL If you don’t want to read the books, don’t buy them. It’s simple.

I’d also like to mention that these books didn’t happen as a result of E.L. James and Fifty Shades of Grey. I am so tired of hearing about that book I want to scream. Does everyone really think that book was the first erotic romance on the market? It certainly seems so. No one is trying to capitalize on that book’s success. HELL!!!! Everyone is just trying to make a buck just like we’ve been trying to do for years! So just to make it clear, Fifty Shades of Grey did not start some literary sexual revolution.

We’ve been doing this for years.

As a matter of fact, if it wasn’t for Ellora’s Cave, the largest publishing company of erotic romance and erotica in the world, e-books wouldn’t be such a big thing now. That’s right. I give full credit to Ellora’s Cave. Isn’t it just lovely that everyone jumped on the e-book bandwagon? Must have been all of those people reading sexed up books that did it, huh? LOL And the vast majority are women, too. SCANDALOUS!!!!

Clandestine Classics are available for you to purchase today. That’s right. It’s release day. Here’s the link: http://www.total-e-bound.com/prodtype.asp?CAT_ID=306&sb=bt&ntt=3&so=all

Now here’s a little request for Total E-Bound:

How about a little Robin Hood and Maid Marian? And I would kill for some scorching hot sex scenes between Rhett Butler and Scarlett O’Hara---but I’m sure there are copyright issues there. SIGHHHHHHHHHHH… Guess I’ll always have to simply imagine Rhett’s sexual prowess.

Congratulations to authors:

Sarah Masters, Desiree Holt, Sierra Cartwright, Amy Armstrong, Marie Sexton. And to Total E-Bound for finding yet another way to put erotic romance on the map!  

The Search for Inspiration

It doesn’t matter what kind of artistic, ‘creative-type’ you might be. Painter. Writer. Sculptor. Actor. Musician. We all need inspiration to make what we do not only  cohesive but beautiful. We are people who make things happen creatively and without inspiration, even our best efforts can fall flat. Finding something that moves us is the key to unlocking the dreams and imaginings we want to share with the world…or maybe even just a small part of it. These days you’d think that would be an easy feat but it’s not as simple as you might think. Let’s face it, we’re busy people living in a world that races rather than walks from one thing to the next.

Maybe the most important key to discovering what moves you is to simply observe. Listen to the radio when you drive. Pay attention when walking through a mall or hanging out in a park. Watch the world around you and find those things that make you say…ahhhh. Those things are the makings of the next major piece of art, a beautiful song or a book that makes a reader sigh.

I’m beginning to think finding inspiration is just a matter of slowing down, taking stock and dragging a few deep breaths into my lungs. Finding a center, a peaceful place deep inside is key to my becoming inspired. Lately, I sit on the back porch in my search for motivation. This is where I get my best ideas, where plots evolve and plans for a book are born. Recently, I’ve relocated from my beloved Texas to sunny Florida and the view from my back patio is spectacular. Orange trees, red birds, lizards and yes, the occasional snake colors my world and in watching them, I gain peace and feel a renewed creativity that I’d believed had gotten lost somewhere along the way. I’ve learned lately that I am motivated by ‘visual’ things. Note the picture of the rugged cowboy and the isolation of his stance. The other day I saw the photo somewhere and knew I ‘had to have him’. Thank God for copy and save because now I know that I can re-visit this guy on my computer and find impetus  for another story of those rough, rugged men of the west. He might be a rancher, a hired hand or even a ‘cowboy shifter’. Who knows where this bit of inspiration might take my next book?

 I’m dying to find out.

Please stop by my website to learn more about me and my books

http://www.reginacarlysle.com

 In other news: Something Wicked This Way Comes, Vol. 2 comes out in print tomorrow at Ellora's Cave.  This book (also available in ebook) features some super hot stories. Tinderbox, my addition to the anthology, is a shifter menage. You know how I love those guys who turn 'furry'. LOL

http://www.jasminejade.com/p-10221-something-wicked-this-way-comes-volume-2.aspx

 

New Places and People; Old Books

Adjusting to that strange new world called FLORIDA is quite the thing ya'll. First off, it's not hot here. Yes, I'm sure the natives would beg to differ but having lived through many a Texas summer, this stuff is not a big deal. The folks back home say the temps are hovering around 105 degrees and positively sweltering. Here in my new place, I'm loving the more moderate stuff. Of course it's humid. Oh dear LORD! Now that's something new but there are definite benefits to that. My hair and skin looks a whole lot better these days. And rainy season? Um. A few weeks ago my daughter and I were shopping for groceries when a thunderstorm hit. Our eyes got big. I mean big. RAIN!!!! Now that's something to celebrate in West Texas so I'm sure the folks at the store wondered why we seemed so damn happy about the deluge of wet stuff. With Tropical Storm Debbie hovering around, we've pretty much been drenched every day and even had to break down and buy umbrellas. Who'd a thunk it????

Settling in good and proper now. We've found the best places for breakfast, lunch and dinner and now where to find the best shopping. What more could a girl ask for? And friends? Yes, I've made a lot of those too. Nice thing, friends. I'm beginning to feel right at home. Hard to believe I've only been here a month.

Now that the settling in has been accomplished and most of my furniture has arrived, I've found the creative energies are beginning to flow again. Getting a divorce and moving clear across the country can have a way of stalling a person out, for sure. But YAY ME...stories are forming and needing to be told. I'm beginning to feel like my "new self"...the old one was pretty fine but this new me is pretty awesome, I think. I'm feeling braver, more sure of myself and yes, more creative. It's a good thing.

And yes...sometimes everything old is new again. Ellora's Cave just re-released my very first EC book at a discounted price. So if you haven't read this one (a hot hot cougar tale) here's your chance to pick it up and give it a 'slow dance'.

http://www.jasminejade.com/p-5785-tempting-tess.aspx

When forty-five-year-old widow Tess Garrity decides it's time to reevaluate her stale life, she rents a charming cabin in the mountains, little expecting her entire life is about to take a drastic turn. She's very drawn and more than a little sexually turned on by the sinfully handsome man next door.

Daniel Rios is captivated by the stunning older woman. She is sweet, funny and sexy enough to make him yearn to fuck her. He wants her more than his next breath but his first order of business is getting rid of an unwanted houseguest. Then Daniel moves in on Tess, tempting her to take another chance on love — with him. It's a naughty, edgy, seductive challenge he is fully prepared to take.

Changing Perspectives

As I mentioned last week, things are really changing in my life. For awhile now, I reckon I'll be discussing this stuff since it's uppermost in my mind. Things are settling in (at last). I still have no living room furniture but that should be remedied in a few more weeks. My sister, who lives here, has loaned me something to use until then. (I KNEW there was a good reason to move close to family...lol...they tend to 'have your back' when needed). The first week any kind of tv-watching was a literal 'pain in the ass' without anything comfy to sit on but now we're managing just fine.

Of course, you know how any kind of move-in is. Disruptive! Anything that can go wrong usually does. We've had minor issues with the apartment and everything we order tends to be a matter of hurry-up-and-wait kind of deal. You know how it is. I suspect that a month from now, I'll have my furniture in place and will have settled in all comfy and cozy.

One thing I have noticed is that my worries over leaving Texas were just silly. Sometimes I think we tend to believe that 'home' is associated with a place rather than with people. I've found folks in Florida friendy, helpful and fun. I've felt so at ease here. A good thing. My smile comes quicker and my writing (yes, I'm writing again) is richer and more complex. If we are surrounded by people we love, it helps bushels. Naturally, I'm missing my son and my mom but hey...who knows? Life has an odd way of changing on us when we least expect it.

New Beginnings

If someone tells you that starting over is easy, don't believe it. Yes, sometimes things go smoothy...great even but most of the time you're so damn unsure of yourself. I'm living this now. After 30 years of being married, I'm getting a divorce and have just completed a 'cross country' move to Florida. Already I miss my Texas and the people and loved ones there and the place will always feel like 'home' to me. But now I have a new one and I'm adjusting as best as I can amid the mountain of unpacked suitcases and boxes. It's getting close to being finished but the whole exercise has left me feeling pretty exhausted (in a good way).

Ending and beginnings. It's tough. All of it. But in the course of all this, I've learned there are good people, friendly people, all around and most are willing to lend a hand to make the transition smoother. Writing these days is pretty tough. Most of the time, my brain is kinda foggy but I'm finding the muck clearing somewhat and I'm actually writing some now. Admittedly, I have great inspiration all around me. From my back patio (empty of any kind of furniture at the moment) I have trees. Lots of trees. One of them is loaded with oranges. Now THAT'S something new for a Texas girl! I've seen mated red birds and even an enormous owl perched in a tree out back. And lizards! Okay, that's familiar but these seem to be a bit more exotic as their throats expand, turning a bright red. Funny. Guess I'll figure out what kind they are soon enough.

Of course, I have NO idea where I'm going. I was given the 'gift' of a map so I've been studying up some. :-) Made it to the grocery store and a few other places. I figure it's a start. Right? Anyway the weather is beautiful and my new place with be livable before I can blink. Mainly, I now have new ideas swimming in my head (scary thought...all that head-swimming) and I'm anxious to start burning up the computer again. A day at a time.

I'm really sorry that I've blogged so sporadically but now you understand, I hope, why I haven't been around much. I must say, it's great to be back.

The Waves, Stars, and Bikers!

Yep, down here in the Myrtle Beach area we just finished up a couple of weeks of Biker Fest. I had heard horror stories about it. Well... turns out it really wasn't bad at all. There was a lot of noise, and I had trouble getting in and out of my street, but all in all it wasn't bad.

The police presence was overwhelming. Never saw so many in one place in my life. State helicopters flew overhead and barricades on residential streets were up. Overall, the police seemed to be in a pretty good mood. They smiled, laughed, and joked whenever you had to go by them in order to get home. And I have it on good authority that one particular dude in uniform got my oldest's phone number. LOL

I did see one biker trying to pop a wheelie on busy busy Hwy 17. He was in the lane next to me and when the stoplight turned green he popped it. Fool came very close to laying down that bike. AND! He wiggled his ass back on--wiggling the bike, too--for a good ways down. If he had fallen? God. I can only imagine the carnage.

The other thing that I had to deal with really only upset me on Thursday night (the 31st). The barricades weren't up yet in my area and bikers used the avenue next to my bedroom window for racing. I didn't sleep all night long. I thought about calling the police but just didn't. I worried someone was going to get hurt. But I also kept thinking that they were only trying to have some fun. You know... YOLO!

YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE!

Last night we walked down to the beach about dusk. There was a guy with a parrot and he put it on my shoulder. I felt like a pirate. LOL I love the smell of the ocean. I just stood there watching those waves and the long shoreline with the twinkling hotel lights. Watched the last remnants of daylight fade to black.The stars are so bright here.

Doesn't get any better than that!