Monday, April 6, 2009

Never ever blog if you're...

There are a few facts about life that will never change. One, is that PMS can and will turn you into a monster. According to the brilliant minds over at Wikipedia symptoms of PMS include:

  • Abdominal bloating (actually this should say: an extra 3 inches around the waist!)
    Abdominal cramps
    Breast tenderness or swelling
    Stress or anxiety (Ya think?!)
    Trouble falling asleep
    Joint or muscle pain
    Mood swings (in other words, back off!)
    Worsening of existing skin disorders, and respiratory (eg, allergies, infection) or eye (bulbar disturbances, conjunctivitis) problems

Don't you love how they stick 'mood swings' near the bottom? LOL That should SOOOO be at the top. No. 1 in fact. So, while I know I shouldn't be blogging while I'm PMSing, the truth is, I couldn't resist. LOL

The first thing I do in the morning after I take the kids to school is watch Monk. We DVR it so I can watch like yesterday's episode while I drink my morning coffee. That show makes me laugh and cry on a good day, but while I'm PMSing? Pfft! I've got tears streaming down my cheeks and the next moment I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe. There should be a warning that comes across the screen, 'do not watch if you're experiencing PMS symptoms'. LOL

Also, don't watch those damn commercials that show gorgeous, perfect women eating that friggin' Special K cereal. I'd like to slap them right upside the head. Who looks like that anyway? What does their diet consist of? A piece of lettuce for lunch and a sensible glass of water for dinner? After I stopped rolling my eyes and cussing at the T.V. I started doing the dishes, but something caught my eye and I looked down to see...dirt. Clods of dirt are all over the kitchen floor. The thing is, my daughters just swept and mopped the kitchen last night. There hasn't been time to dirty the kitchen. I start to get a little frustrated, but then I glanced down at my shoes and realize I'M the one who tracked in the dirt!! Damn, had that been my kids I would have done the whole, "I work hard to keep this house clean, blah, blah, blah". So, do you think I should give myself that lecture before I sweep up the dirt clods? LOL

So, after I swept up the kitchen I sat down and checked my email and saw that my Amazon order has shipped. I'm getting Lora Leigh's "Nauti Intentions", two Cindy Gerard books (her Black Ops series), and the first book in Nalini Singh's Psy-changeling series. Someone here recommended her to me, so I figured I'd give her a try.

Ahhh, will you look at that? The perfect cure for PMS. A shipment of books. Can I hear an amen?!


Kelley Nyrae said...

Know the feeling. It sucks. Women have to go through everything. LOL.

Anonymous said...

LOL. I too got my relief in my email from Amazon saying that they had shipped Nauti Intentions!

My dh thanks the book gods every month. :-)

Anonymous said...

Okay Anne. You're going to LOVE Nalini Singh's Psy/Changeling series but you HAVE to go back to Amazon and order Angels Blood, her new Angel series book. OMG BEST BOOK I have EVER read woman. Hot, sexy, mouth-watering, panty dropping Angels floating around. You won't have time to PMS with those boys around. YUM.

I agree with Kelley. Not bad enough we have to bottle up our feelings (cuz guys just don't like to "talk about how they feel"), have babies, be the smarter sex and have chocolate addictions that cause us to knock out whoever gets in our way, but to add that on top of it! lol.

Anne Rainey said...

Kelley--Why couldn't it be like once every six months? I mean, once a month? Dang!

Chris--I CANNOT Wait for NI!! I've been counting the days, I swear!

Amanda--Dang it, woman! You know I need to start at the beginning! I can't buy Singh's other books until I read her backlist! LOL

Judith Leger said...

I don't PMS anymore, but if I don't have my hormones on a daily basis, watch out. Great post!!

Judy said...

I am past PMS also, but I still have something like those days. I guess that is just being a woman :)

And I Amen your comment about books. I also remember that I have some extra money on my Amazon account, so I need to order!!!

Judy (

Mary Ricksen said...

Thank God, I am past the mood swings and into menopause. There you don't have mood swings, you are feeling that way all the time!
But not worrying about when it will come is a wonderful thing.
The hairs on my chin stink though, I'll tell you that.

Kathye Quick said...

Also never blog if
...your son just told you he lost 40 pounds in two months. tried to set up a blog yourself knowing you can only cave paint had this great plot in your head and just saw a book someone wrote exactly like it on the shelf.

Thanks for making me laugh

Genella deGrey said...

Ahhhh - a shipment of books. Perfect. And when next you feel the monster stirring, find some St. John's Wort herbal supplements. They will take the edge off . . . and just might save some lives in the process!


Emma Lai said...

Seeing the "Your books have shipped" email is always guaranteed to brighten my day. As for PMS...well no one ever told me that being pregnant is like having PMS for months.

Regina Carlysle said...

Past PMS here...THANK GOD!!!! But BOY do I remember those days. I was never all that bitchy but I could cry BUCKETS. Glad that is all behind me...oh WAIT...I forgot about those pesky HOT FLASHES and the two new WRINKLES that weren't there a few days ago.ACK!!!!! Sometimes I think we women can't win.

Julie Robinson said...

Anne, I love Monk too!! Hope you're feeling better since I'm a day late. Your title caught my eye.

Here's something that might make you feel more justified. The lady who inspects my car every year has a sign in her garage that says something like this:

PMS gives a woman an excuse once a month to act like a man acts everyday.

I snarl this saying at my DH when he's acting like an A** and dares to imply that my testy mood is a result of PMS. Ah, sweet love . . .